The Do’s and Don’ts of Dating Profiles

(Originally published on sommetdame.com on August 8, 2018)

In the digital age, dating apps and sites are in their prime with no indication of going anywhere. In fact, their usage and success increase every year, with the majority of users ages 18-24, indicating that the popularity of online dating will only continue to rise.

Today about 1 in 5 relationships starts online. Online dating in its infancy was something a lot of users were embarrassed about- there used to be an inherent desperation associated with it. Many viewed joining eHarmony or Match.com as a last resort after unsuccessful real world encounters. In 2018, however, the inundation of technology, social media, and the existence of apps for just about everything has allowed online dating to flourish. Dating apps and sites can be invaluable in finding and meeting a potential partner. That being said, the dating profile you create can either make or break your chance at romance. Here are some tips on how to set yourself up for success.

Don’t Be Deceitful
Your dating profile is the first step in a potential relationship. Don’t start off on the wrong foot by putting forward a false representation of yourself. That means you should select profile pictures that give the best, most realistic impression. Posting too many selfies with several filters can not only skew your actual image, it can also create the sense that you don’t like your true appearance. The same goes for using old pictures of yourself. Of course, younger pictures can be flattering, but your pictures and your age should both be accurate.

Being honest on your dating profile also means that your bio should reflect who you are, not who you’re trying to be or not to be. Don’t lie about your age, your height, your job, or your interests. A whopping 53% of online daters lie on their profiles about these factors, among others. Don’t be one of them. You’re just setting yourself up for failure. If you’re using online dating, it’s because you are in search of a romantic partner and you probably don’t want to be tricked. Neither do your potential matches.

Don’t Overshare
With the last point in mind, there is a fine line between presenting an accurate depiction of yourself and revealing too much. Even if you are on the rebound after a recent breakup, don’t go into those details in your profile. If you meet someone and your past comes up as it inevitably will, then you can tell all about your prior relationship. Don’t use your dating profile to air your laundry list of grievances with the opposite sex. Just because you’re sick and tired of meeting guys who are X, Y, and Z does not mean you should say so. And beyond this, don’t list exactly what you are looking for. Advertising that you are seeking a tall, dark, and handsome lawyer who is at least 6’4” with corgi and a Mercedes is seriously going to limit your options in more ways than one.

Don’t overshare when it comes to pictures either. Posting pictures in your underwear is going to give the right guy the wrong idea, and definitely attract some creepy characters. And since these profiles are public, don’t post anything you wouldn’t want your parents, boss, neighbors, etc. to see.

Don’t share your phone number or address. Just don’t.

Don’t Post Pictures With Your Ex
You might look great, but you’re better off just cropping your ex out of the frame. A potential match could get the wrong impression that you’re still not over your old relationship.

DO List Your Hobbies
What do you like to do for fun? Whether its surfing, cooking, or training carrier pigeons, your hobbies are an excellent conversation-starter and potential first date activity.

DO Mention If You Have Kids
If your profile does not indicate in any way that you are a parent, you’re probably setting yourself up to blindside someone on a first date. You don’t need to post pictures of your kids or post their names and ages, but making a note on your profile that you are a parent can save some surprise.

DO Say What You’re Looking For
If you want a relationship or just a hookup, why not say so? This will eliminate a lot of confusion in the long run.

DO Share Your Social Media
If you feel comfortable with strangers seeing your public Twitter or Instagram accounts, linking them in your dating profile can be an easy way of letting matches get to know you a bit better.

Remember that dating profiles are public, and you never know who is going to be swiping past your face. Finding the perfect balance of personal information and flattering, realistic photos can be tricky, so it can be helpful to ask a friend for a second opinion. While there isn’t a clear cut, foolproof method for finding love on dating apps and sites, putting your best face forward is a great start, and after that it’s all chance.